i wish i was still 15
my last year of innocence
before i ran pursuing what i considered
adulthood

my last year of truly feeling
before my mind and body began
crumbling away
every passing day

i wish i was still 15
heart racing at being hugged
or being asked to spend the night

---

i don't know how long i'll last
i know you want it to be forever
but i don't know if i can
i can't be here forever
i can't be with you forever
the rotten towel on the floor
gets worse every day
crying myself to sleep in your arms
and waking up to a dent in the bed where you were
every night
again and again
i want it to last
i want to make it last forever
but i don't know if i can

i miss my old life
i miss my family
i miss myself
i miss your old life
and our old life

jun 2022
home